Rumpology

David's Rump by Finijo

The Internet is chock-full-o crap. All kinds of crap that I never in a million years would have believed existed, if I didn't see it on the Internet. That leads me to my latest find, Rumpology - which is pretty much like Astrology, but with asses. Jackie Stallone touts Rumpology as a way to see the future.

From Jacqueline Stallone's website:

Just as a print of your fingerprints, palms, or soles and ears tell a story, so does your rump. The lines, crevices and folds of your fanny, rear-end for those of you in the U.K., can, to the trained eye, reveal your personality, fate, and future in luck and love. So they thought in ancient India and Babylon and so today. The Greeks used palm and behind prints to determine health and fidelity. The Romans used the prints to reveal hidden talents and future success. The prints reveal your whole being.

For $125.00 you can take a picture of your own ass (or have a friend help you out) and send it to Sylvester Stallone's mother, so she can then tell you about who you are and what the future holds for you. I find it more than a bit scary imagining that people not only take her up on her offer to read their ass, but also pay her money in the hope that their butt will hold the key to their future. People are idiots - and I think Jackie Stallone may be the evil queen of the idiots.

I hope someone sends her a picture of an ass so fat, hairy and pimply that she pukes.