Worlds I've Never Visited

The Legend of Leigh Bowery

I just finished watching the documentary, The Legend of Leigh Bowery on TRIO (Pop Culture TV) and once again I was amazed at all that I do not know. Bowery was a fashion designer/club kid/walking work of art in the 1980's and into the 1990's, and his designs were beautiful, startling, and nightmarish all at once. Some of what he designed brings to mind Divine wearing the clothes of a gay Mexican wrestler. He did performance art and worked with the choreographer, Michael Clark and was painted by Lucien Freud. His legacy is twisted and grotesque, but you have to respect anyone willing to live their life on their own terms. He died on New Year's Eve 1994.

Running with Scissors

Augusten Age 10

I went to a feedback session to review the neuropsychological evaluation of one of my clients a few weeks ago, and got a very nice surprise. One of the staffers at the facility, Glenda, was getting rid of a load of books that had been swapped among the staff members until everyone that wanted to, got a chance to read them. So that day, I went into the office to meet with an unstable, bipolar client to give her the bad news that there is nothing I can do for her until she gets her medication adjusted and she's stable (which is highly unlikely because she has been trying for more than 10 years without success), and I walked out with a bag of books. It turned out to be a really lucky day for me, the client was already thinking that she wasn't ready for work (so she wanted her case closed) and I got books. This was a major coup because the bag contained a book that I have been meaning to read, Devil in the White City (Matt loaned me a copy, but Marilyn snatched it while I was finishing Hillary Clinton's Living History, enjoyed it BTW).

The wonderful bag of books also contained about 12 books on serial killers (some of which I never heard of before) and a book called Running with Scissors, by Augusten Burroughs. I started this book before Devil in the White City, (not sure why) and I really enjoyed it. I would have to compare Burroughs to David Sedaris, because his book is a memoir of a gay man and it's very funny. The difference between Burroughs and Sedaris is that Burroughs is well acquainted with mental illness (family, friends, boyfriend and adopted family), so his work is darker than Sedaris'. In spite of the darker side to his work, I think Burroughs is one of my new favorite authors.

Mt. Stevemore

Steve at Mt. Rushmore

Steve visited Mt. Rushmore in Rapid City, South Dakota while on a business trip. He took some gorgeous photos of the trip and posted them on his website.

Ukiah

Redwood photo by Stephen Dukes

Steve is in Ukiah, California for work this week and he has taken some amazing photos of the mountains, redwoods and the valley. The airport he shot is nestled in a valley between three mountains. He has a keen eye for a beautiful shot, and his photos are a testament to his love of nature.

Hell's Flower

Hell's Flower

This is one of the first pictures I took with the digital camera we bought a couple of years ago. Marilyn doctored it a bit with the software that came with the camera, and we dubbed the result Hell's Flower. We liked the juxtaposition of the words and the contrast of the colors in the photo. Since I started blogging, I have had this picture and the words "Hell's flower" rattling around in my head. A recent revelation helped me to channel the unspent sentiments behind the image and inspired this Haiku:

Deceit, Hell's flower
Resplendent in its allure
Tainted essence, foul.

Emperor Bush's New Clothes

Emperor Bush's New Clothes

I've decided that the third debate warrants a "less is more" approach. I watched the debate. I can't help feeling that Bush is walking down the street butt nekkid waiving and winking at the American people with the expectation of admiration for his policies and his actions while he has been in office. Watching this spectacle, I am in a state of shock and awe at his complete exposure as a fraud and charlatan and I cannot believe that everyone else in the country can't see him for what he is, and what he's not - an American president.

Highway to Hell

Highway to Hell

Tonight’s second presidential debate showed once again why Bush cannot be re-elected. He is a smarmy, smirking liar, and I pray that the fact checkers show him for exactly what he is. I’m looking forward to the coverage of this debate over the next few days.

Watching Bush wink and smirk his way through his convoluted retorts in what he clearly views as a witty manner (how else do you explain the winking and smirking?) absolutely sickens me. His answers to straight forward questions asked on the subjects of tort reform, stem cell research, tax cuts, the war in Iraq, the Patriot Act and replacing supreme court justice vacancies rang false. This was not the slam-dunk that the first debate was, but it showed that Kerry is better equipped to stay cool under pressure and that he can convey a clear message. Bush did not come across as childish as he did in the first debate, but he still looked uncomfortable and twitchy.

I think that Kerry came across as more informed and better able to keep his answers understandable and on track than Bush. I was particularly impressed with his answer to the question on abortion. I think that he answered that question in the only way an American can answer it. I LOVE that Kerry said that he would not legislate his own morality at the cost of constitutional rights. Bush continued throughout this debate to stand beside his decision to go to Iraq, stay in Iraq and he bases it all on his continued belief that Saddam was amassing weapons of mass destruction, in spite of reports from the U.S. arms inspector stating that the means to create weapons of mass destruction were not in place when the U.S. invaded.

“Flip-flopping” is not a bad thing, if it means you can change your position when circumstances change - as circumstances have a way of doing. I think the biggest liability for Bush right now is his stubbornness in “staying the course.” The course we are on is not taking the U.S. where it needs to go to heal and flourish as a nation. It is not allowing us to join the rest of the world to try to repair some of the damage that we have caused through our ethnocentrism and our corporate and political greed. Bill Maher likened Bush’s stance in Iraq to the stereotypical male who gets lost, but won’t admit it and won’t pull off the highway and ask for directions. If he’s not going to flip-flop, I wish Bush would at least stop and ask for directions.

Sloppy Seconds

Undead or Alive?

The debate between Senator Edwards and Vice President Cheney tonight did not hold my attention to the same degree as the first debate between Senator Kerry and President Bush. Granted, it was the second debate for the upcoming election and the debaters were Oval Office equivalent of the Junior Varsity team, so it stands to reason that it would be less engrossing. The look of the debate (seated behind a desk) made it a bit less formal, and definitely less "presidential." Edwards misspoke and at times used the words Iraq and Iran interchangeably, but he did it with enthusiasm, so he still trumped an indolent, prickly Cheney.

In my opinion, Edwards reigned supreme over this debate. He stood his ground and appeared to be congenial and in control throughout most of the debate. He had clear and concise answers when Vice President Cheney questioned his character and his record. Cheney on the other hand, struck me as clinically depressed. His answers rung hollow he just seemed weak. VP Cheney was hunched over the desk, wringing his hands with his coat bunched up behind him giving him the air of a sad, albino hunchback. The only matter that left me disappointed in Senator Edwards was the issue of gay marriage, which he stated both he and Kerry are against. VP Cheney in a surprising maneuver (or lack thereof) sidestepped that issue completely. So, I guess when Senator Edwards stated he is against gay marriage, but he’s for “equal benefits for gay couples,” it is better than Bush’s reactionary stance or “nothing” from Cheney.

The subject of Kerry “flip-flopping” regarding his position on Iraq was of particular interest to me. I have to believe that many people (if not most people) in the U.S. have been conflicted about the war since before it started. I know that my feelings about the war are mixed. Yes, Saddam is a bad man and should not be in power, but if the goal all along was simply to depose a sadistic dictator, then I resent being fed the pretext of a nonexistent link to al Qaida. My feelings about the war have changed in direct relation to the changes in the information I have had about the war and the reason for going to war. I am glad that Kerry is more fluid in his approach to governing than Bush. I am very uncomfortable with anyone who will “stay the course” in the face of evidence that we are going the wrong way. The longer I live, the more I see the subtle shades of gray that pervade all of the complex issues we face. The world is not black and white and it is not colored in a rosy hue. Change in the world is inevitable, and change in how we view our place in the world must be embraced for us to endure and thrive.

Job Quest

Murky by Finijo

As my job search is ongoing (and how!), I will post this blog, then periodically add to it.

10/02/04
I spent the last year and a half spectacularly failing to find a new, and better paying job. The irony of my situation is that I am an employment counselor. I have applied for the few jobs that were available in my field, which specifically involves counseling, disabilities, and employment. While the type of work I do (vocational rehabilitation counseling) is specialized, I have a wide variety of experience, a good work history, a master's degree and a national certification. The problems I am encountering are threefold:

1. The job market is lousy right now (I will lay this at W's feet).
2. I am in the upper range of salary for my line of work, so I really can't take any job in the field and expect the pay to be the same.
3. The few available jobs in my salary range seem to be freezing as soon as I send in my application. Odd, but true.

The lack of options is disheartening.

10/03/04
I heard about a job that sounds like employment perfection to me, Resident Scholar. Not just any scholar, but a scholar at the Ethics and Public Policy Center. How cool would that job be?

10/27/04
I went for a job interview today at Houston Community College and it was the strangest interview I have ever been on (and I have had some weird interviews). I got the call yesterday about 2:00 PM letting me know that the job I applied for in July (yes, July) was now interviewing and I was being invited for one of two openings available for the interview (2:00 PM or 4:00 PM). I chose the 2:00 PM slot and then asked my manager if I could have the day off, just to avoid being stressed out about work and the interview on the same day. I arrived an appropriate 15 minutes early and I was escorted upstairs to an empty conference room. I sat there for the next 15 minutes waiting for someone to arrive. The first person that arrived seemed perplexed that nobody else was there and excused herself to go get some coffee. She came back a few minutes later and she and I were still the only ones in the room. Next the interpreters came in and I tried to chat a bit, but my reception was chilly (to say the least). Finally, the woman who called me came into the room and upon realizing that I was in the room, she escorted me out into a lobby across the hall from the room to wait for the rest of the panel to arrive. At 2:20 PM I was escorted back into the room and got to see the panel. There were 3 people in the room that I know (and that know me), but not one of them acknowledged that they knew me. I was a little taken aback, but played along and did not mention that I knew them when they introduced themselves. I was asked 12 questions and I answered them and then I was given the chance to ask a few questions. I was then told by the woman who called me, "Well, that's all we have," everyone looked down at their paperwork. I gathered at that point that I needed to leave. I was in my car and pulling out of the parking lot by 2:46 PM, wondering what the hell just happened. I came away from the interview feeling like everyone in the room was privy to the secret agenda for the meeting but me. The experience was so Twilight Zone that I was just relieved it was over. I will not be holding my breath waiting to find out if I got the job.
11/01/04I got my application for the VA job back today and it had a form letter that stated that I left out a form. This isn't the end of the world, because there isn't actually a job open at this time, but I was trying get my application on file for future openings. One more set back. Sigh...
11/04/04
I got my rejection from the Dept. of Labor. Apparently, I missed the sentence in the job posting that said that you would not be eligible to apply if you had not worked for the Federal Government previously.
11/06/04
Much to my surprise, I got a letter from the Dept. of Labor today that states that I am under consideration for the Vocational Rehabilitation Specialist position. I forgot that while I was job hunting I found two job postings in two different places for what appeared to be the same job in Houston. It was odd, but because they were listed under two different announcement numbers. I guess I didn't qualify for one, but I did for the other. Looks like the game is still on.
11/12/04
No word, yet. This sucks.